So far this week I have logged 11 hours work time. And I didn’t get to work til noon yesterday.  Life going great. I played WII Fit this weekend, and floated around in clear water. Not a lot of sleep though.

By the time you read this, I’ll be headed South, the project will be at the printer, my car will be oiled, gassed, rotated and braving the open highway.

No shoes, No shirt, No problem. Coffee, pina coladas and a good book. Full moon, bright skies, the sound of running water.

Priceless

Your result for Which Chess Piece are You Test?…

The Queen’s Confidante

Congrats! Only 5-7% of the population score this!

The Queen’s Confidante is the first to hear the beat of a different drum. Many plunge into the avant garde experience and generally set the trend for their friends. They are more in touch with reality using their senses but this makes them want to live for the ‘here and now’. The Confidante is full of charm and may flow with compliments even if it isn’t deserved. Rather than write a poem on the beauty of life – they would rather live out the written story of beauty.

The Queen’s Confidante is usually peaceful and easygoing in nature. They usually adopt a ‘live and let live’ approach to life. They take things at their own pace and live for the moment. They may be quiet but are pleasant, considerate and caring. They may not be inclined to debate or air their views, but of course their values are important to them. They will solve problems as they arise especially if it concerns people. Generally the Confidante is one who develops great team spirit through the promotion of cooperation. They will only repeat facts without placing too much spin or interpretation on them. Because of this they may be the best mediators.

The Confidante is sensitive to its environment, and much more perceiving than others with regards to the physical world. They can notice variations in behavior of others. They are highly conscious of companions and friends, but they prefer to let others direct. This ‘Pawn’ is rarer than others because they are emotionally well rounded with a great degree of empathy. Because of this empathy, they can be overly concerned with ‘feelings’. They may even sacrifice their ideals and not contribute enough, especially if they don’t wish to exercise criticism.

Take Which Chess Piece are You Test? at HelloQuizzy

So I will have to settle for Easter Island Crazy I could be a tourist attraction!!! Thats a goal I can surely work on and achieve. This is from one of my favorite places because it never fails to crack me up.

(if you click on picture you can read it)

Well the place I give several hundred dollars to each year to work on pool crap basically said they would come out for $65 and take a look at my pool. (I don’t need a look I know what I need and was asking them specifically, with serial numbers.) Sometimes it sucks living on the yuppie side of town.

So for $15 I bought the part somewhere else, and the glue stuff. And I put it on. I don’t know yet if it is leak proof, if it will make dad proud.  (he fixed it last time and I helped.) I have to wait for the glue to dry.

Does anyone know how to get super super epoxy glue off your leg? or your hands?

First Stop my house.

You remember Girl Scouts?

Well I propose we have a batshitcrazy club and you can get awards for things.

Heck I’m already working on my electrocution/drowning/blindinoneeye/itchyfromgodknowswhatchemical badges.

All at one time. And I have a crazy dog that won’t stop drinking swimming pool water. And another crazy dog that won’t stop chewing the electric line that goes to the swimming pool.

So this morning I was thinking what if there was a way to … BLOW IT UP I so would.

Ok, I hadn’t had my coffee yet and realized that its kind of hard to blow up water. So I reasoned it wasn’t its fault its hot and the sun is sucking chlorine like all the suck jokes you have ever heard. So I decided to be nice to it. Kill the Algae AGAIN and raise the chlorine level.

When I got home from work, I ducttaped the electrical cord again. (yes I know and on some level must not care) unless you are an insurance agent then What? Added water to the pool, thought about what my neighbor said about water in his yard, the liner, no the back wash hose leaking and something I read on the internet.

When I got back from the gym, a quick google told me all the dirty truth. MY SPIDER GASKET was kinked or bad. (same difference in most religons.)

So thinking about how life isn’t fair and I’m not a man and I don’t have upper body strength the one man who shares my dna in calling distance is a brat boy and will give me a “that pool sucks money” lecture and I just don’t want to hear it. I dig up two screwdrivers, both the same size, neither a phillips. Its nights like tonight I wish I had a partner. At least he could hold the flashlight while I took the thing apart, got the last screw stuck, wanted to cry but couldn’t and made myself laugh at the batshitcrazy dogs. (who have earned a lot of badges, let me just say) Heck, he might even have a nice tool set. I get all but the last screw off, try too hard and snapped it off on accident. water everywhere, dogs yapping like crazy, me in the backyard on an almost full moon night  soaking wet, screwdriver in hand screaming shutupshutupshutup at the dogs, who comply, when they see the electrical cord in one hand, the water gushing everywhere.

So I realize that the SPIDER VALVE is bad, and there is no hope. I go in the house. I look in the junk drawer. Caulk, liquid cementystuff, gooeyshoey stuff, I think rationally. “I could fuck this up tonight with my pipe dreams of fixing it by inventing a gasket out of a paper clip and a Cheeto and end up with a gummed up mess. Or I could rig something crazy up and tomorrow buy a gasket.” My rational, don’t live in a fantasy world self wins. I go outside, screw the cover back on the pieceofshit pump and get the bright idea of taking the vacuum hose and attaching it to the leaky backwash drain and running it back into the pool.

My roommate, (he of the FINE) assesses the situation, my colorful vocabulary, my assessment of my dog’s morals, and says, “you could make a gasket” (see fuck this up) I say something about if I made a gasket the pool would blow up and go take a shower to get the chlorine out of my eye. (splashed there by dog trying to drink ALL the swimming pool water and by my crazy self trying to rig the vacuum hose.)

So I wash off the stuff and only have a few chemical burns on my arm, hardly noticeable and about 10 bug bites on my legs. Did I meantion my back yard smells like a cow pasture? and the crazy electrical dog. (Paisley) keeps trying to dig to China in all the nice slimy mud.

I ask the roommate about making a gasket. (knowitall) and he says, oh you could make a gasket out of this, you could make a gasket out of that. And they make sense. For a normal gasket. I explain the situation and he agrees that, not for the SPIDER,

A couple of weeks ago I posted a list of stuff and asked if anyone wanted more info. J e-mailed me about a couple. (if you want more wedding than I posted let me know)

Well once upon a time. There was this woman who lived in a house. The house had rooms, walls, doors, floors and all the other things that come with living in a house. One day her son said to her, “Hey I know I’m a senior and school has started but I want to go live with my dad and finish school there.” Well actually he mostly said, but wait, let me sum up.

He goes to live with his dad. The house is empty. The dad sues for child support even though he owes a nice SUV worth of back child support. The woman’s boss retires and she searches and searches but all the jobs she finds pay a lot less than she was making. Her car dies and the world turns a funky green. But wait, anyway she spends a lot of money on crappy stuff like home repairs and lawyers and she has unemployment income. She watches her savings dwindle and shrink to the size of a roll of quarters.

 She thinks and thinks and decides that she is going to have to work two jobs. She starts thinking about second jobs and decides it would just be easier to share living expenses. Like half the rent and utilities. So she advertises in a couple of places and meets a girl that seems really sweet, like a cross between A and her best friend A. It seems kinda odd that the girl has lived three places in the last year, but all will be revealed.

So the girl pays a deposit and moves in. Soon she decides she needs a boyfriend and a dog to go with the pharmacy of pills on her dresser. She doesn’t have furniture, but she has a dog and a big dog which is a puppy and all its supplies. She doesn’t want to potty train dog and freaks out if it runs around in the house. One night she goes away and lets the dog cry all night in the back yard. This drives the woman crazy so she brings the dog in and snuggles it and all is quiet.

The girl decides she needs to move because the meds aren’t working and the dog needs more space. She moves out and lets the woman know about a week later in an e-mail. The woman decides that crazy is as crazy does and places another ad.

Crazy busy, so have some lyrics. Name of who not posted? google it sweetie.

I’m the sparrow on the roof
I’m the list of everyone I have to lose
I’m the rainbow in the dart
I am who I was and how much I can hurt

So I will look for you in stories of hurricanes
Westward leading, still proceeding
To the world unseen

I’m the mirror in the hall
From your empty room I can hear it fall
Now that we must live apart
I have a lock of hair and one-half of my heart

So I will look for you
Between the grooves of songs we sing
Westward leading, still proceeding
To the world unseen

There are no gifts that will be found
Wrapped in winter, laid beneath the ground
You must be somewhere in the stars
‘Cause from a distance comes the sound of your guitar

And I will look for you in Memphis and the miles between
I will look for you in morphine and in dreams
I will look for you in the rhythm of my bloodstream
Westward leading, still proceeding
To the world unseen

Why is this necessary in life?

You know a dream is like a river
Ever changin’ as it flows
And a dreamer’s just a vessel
That must follow where it goes
Trying to learn from what’s behind you
And never knowing what’s in store
Makes each day a constant battle
Just to stay between the shores…and

I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I’ll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry

Too many times we stand aside
And let the waters slip away
‘Til what we put off ’til tomorrow
Has now become today
So don’t you sit upon the shoreline
And say you’re satisfied
Choose to chance the rapids
And dare to dance the tide…yes

I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I’ll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry

There’s bound to be rough waters
And I know I’ll take some falls
But with the good Lord as my captain
I can make it through them all…yes

I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I’ll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry

Yes, I will sail my vessel
‘Til the river runs dry
‘Til the river runs dry